( Mar. 15th, 2009 10:21 am)
Dear Airport Custodial staff, specifically whichever one of you takes care of the women's bathrooms,

I appreciate all that you do. I have been in the position to regularly clean bathrooms before, and in some ways would rather be doing that to what I currently do. I know you deal with a lot of shit (mmmm, pithy) and I respect you for continuing to carry on and do your jobs in the face of masses of ignorant people who find nothing wrong with leaving toilet paper strewn all over the floor or peeing on seats.

That being said, is it at all possible to refill the toilet seat covers in a way that makes them actually dispensable? Its a serious waste of resources to have them to begin with, but since they are there, shouldn't we all be able to use them at least? There are instructions on the packaging in three languages! There is no excuse for this, really.

With love and respect,

A former bathroom scrubber

Dear various males who happen to also work in my vicinity,

My possession of a pair of boobs does not make me open and public property. Stop fucking touching me, hitting on me and various other scummy tactics to make it into my space. I am not unfriendly, if you manage to respect my space. Just knock it the fuck off already!

With a growing urge to kick your ass,

the female person whose space you think belongs to you.
( Mar. 15th, 2009 05:21 pm)
I read this and almost died laughing

I'm not sure I can summarize except to say that the paper abstract presented beyond that link is the reason we don't use Aesop's fables as a basis of fact in Biology research.
( Mar. 15th, 2009 08:05 pm)
Holy Snapping Duck Do! I just got slapped with a wet salmon - really - I have not updated this since people stopped clapping and Tinkerbell died... You would not believe it only hurts when I laugh. I hope you still love me!.

I am flat out like a lizard drinking with finding Jesus (after someone told me he was lost), being distracted by the shiny, just generally being a nuisance to various lawyers I met recently, my day sprawls from the second I am woken by murderous Teletubbies to I am begging my kid to go to sleep or so help me God that kid will be decorating my wall, 'Duct tape still life'. I am quite the socialite. can't they see I am blogging.

I swear on the bones of my ancestors think of me as I battle mine enemies. You have my word! What do you mean you don't believe me?
.

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